Lost Tooth February 26, 2008

I had a meeting tonight and called to talk to J before he went to bed. He told me he lost his tooth, but he REALLY lost it in the snowbank at school. He said there was a slight chance he would find it in the Spring. He was going to write a note to the tooth fairy about the situation and hope that she understands. I told him that I thought she would. He said that one of his teachers said they never heard of anyone losing a tooth in a snowbank at Woodbury (his school) before, so he wasn’t sure the tooth fairy would understand.

J also told me that no one knew that he lost his tooth, and he just stood there crying WITHOUT making a sound. (Any parent knows this is the really, really sad cry when this happens.) Hannah saw that he was crying and said, I think he is crying because he lost his tooth.

Because Hannah and J have a very tumultuous relationship, I commented that Hannah was being quite nice today. He said yes and added that they played nicely at the after school program too.

This makes me think of another tooth fairy episode that happened last summer. J lost a tooth. (I think it was his fourth lost tooth.) A and I have a system for situations like this. Before I go to bed, A double checks that I have played the tooth fairy. On this night, he did not do his double checking duty, so I forgot what I needed to do.

In the morning, J woke up very early, like 6 am early, to find the tooth fairy hadn’t arrived. He came into our room very upset. I started thinking about what color I would choose for my WORST MOM forehead tattoo. I told him to come snuggle up in bed with me and prayed he would fall asleep. Between prayers, I racked my brain on how I could fix the problem in a believable manner. He fell asleep, and I went to work.

Tooth Fairy fix:
1. Grab a small sheet of paper that is clearly ripped off a much larger sheet. It MUST be tooth fairy sized!
2. Write a note using your wrong writing hand…the tooth fairy does NOT have time to learn to print well. A believable note might include some sort of emergency situation and something to make the child feel special. It also helps to write choppy sentences since the tooth fairy would be in a very large hurry trying to catch up. Initials will also help present a convincing rush feel.

Sorry late. Got wing caught in window frame. Had to go to doctor. TF

3. Do NOT forget to leave the money AND a little extra because you are in this situation to begin with.
4. Act surprised when your child finds the note.

Unintended Consequences of Tooth Fairy Fix:
1. Child feels horrible that he doubted the Tooth Fairy, particularly when the Tooth Fairy visits despite bandaged wing and pain.

Intended Consequence of Tooth Fairy Fix:
1. Child feels incredibly special that the tooth fairy visited DESPITE bandaged wing and pain.

Quote of the Day February 26, 2008

J: Every kid deserves Cartoon Network.

(We don’t have cable.)

Snow? Snow! More snow? February 23, 2008

We are already 12.5 inches of snow above average here. Last weekend, as I was snowblowing (for some reason, I really like to do this even though I end up smelling like gasoline afterward), A and J built this awesome snowfort.

They used a big plastic bin to make the blocks of snow and then filled in the cracks with snow. The result has been LOTS of people slowing down as they drive by while J is playing in it and giving a shout or a thumbs up. The UPS man even told me to tell him awesome fort when he was here and J was not.  Unfortunately, after this fort was built last weekend we entered a deep freeze, but this weekend looks alot better.

The new gloves I ordered for J are working great as is the backpack. I also found him a new jacket for next winter on sale for less than $20!!

Here is a funny picture of our dog Drake. A took the picture just as he was licking his lips.

I didn’t finish… February 20, 2008

Sunday, I took J and T to The Spiderwick Chronicles. J went to the bathroom before left and took a LONG time. We were not rushing him, but for some reason, he felt as if we would be late. When we got in the car, this is the conversation that ensued:

J: “I didn’t finish, but that we should go.”

Mom: “You can go back in the house and finish. We won’t be late.”

J: “No, let’s go.”

Mom: “You can finish at the movie theatre when I’m getting tickets.”

T: “The movie doesn’t start right away. There are always ten minutes of previews.”

*Long pause*

J: “I don’t think you guys understand what I mean when I said I didn’t finish.”

Mom: “What did you mean?”

J: “I didn’t finish wiping. I stopped halfway through.”

*Incredulous laughing from T and Mom*

Mom: “Jack, you can never do that! You will get a rash and it will hurt unless you wipe clean completely. There is ALWAYS time to wipe clean.”

T: “Yeah, I learned that the hard way when I was a kid.”

*Long pause*

J: “Yeah, I remember I learned that the hard way when I was a kid, too.”

Evidentally, he didn’t learn the lesson well enough, but he did wipe clean and wash well when we got to the movie theatre.

There’s always next year. February 13, 2008

J and I were watching American Idol tonight…the episode where the judges widdle down the last 50 to the top 24 who will compete in the coming weeks. A guy who was quite good was told no because he had a bad audition the last time the judges saw him. After he was told no by the judges, he started to cry. J said to me, “These judges are getting really mean.” (They are much meaner before and after this episode and quite nice during this episode actually.) J then says to the guy on the tv, “Don’t be sad. There is always next year.”

One minute passes.

J says to me, “I almost started to cry because he was crying.”

Sometimes, my J is such a tender heart. I am so thankful for these times!

Smel-ly Gloves, Smel-leee Gloves February 12, 2008

J is only 7 and yet he sometimes smells like a hockey player. (Maybe it is his northern Minnesota roots.) His winter gloves are a perfect example. Because we live where it is COLD and because the cold shouldn’t prevent one from going outside to play, I try to purchase quality gear – gloves, jackets, boots, hats, etc.

Well, it seems that while his gloves are super warm, they are disgustingly SMELLY. (Because J loves Friends, I tried to invoke Phoebe’s Smelly Cat song in the title of this post. If nothing interests him on television, he insists we turn it to Friends. He thinks Friends is on WHENEVER he wants to watch it because it is on from 6-7pm every night. Explaining to him that it is NOT on whenever he wants it to be on is a bit difficult as he replies, “But, it is ALWAYS on.”)

I wash the gloves and they get smellier. They are now to the point where if you casually touch one to hand to him, your fingers reek too. So, I ordered a pair from Land’s End. Additionally, I purchased him a new backpack because the zipper is starting to go on his. The backpack he is using was purchased from Land’s End for a diaper bag before he was born. I think my sister Mary bought it for me. Now, I know this diaper bag/backpack cost over $40 seven years ago, but it has been used continually for 7 years! First as a diaper bag, then as a traveling bag, then as a backpack. I did some hunting on ebay for some cool superhero patches and we decorated it up for J’s kinder year.

When I shop Land’s End, I ALWAYS shop the Overstock section for the best possible deals. The new backpack cost me $19.99 and should last until backpacks aren’t cool anymore!

This American Life February 11, 2008

I am a HUGE This American Life addict. (For those of you not in the know, this is the BEST non-news show on NPR! For those of you keeping track, All Things Considered is the BEST news show on NPR.) I will listen to the same one over and over. I hate it when we are driving somewhere during the show and we drive away from the reception. Quite literally, I get all anxious and my stomach gets cramped. I start searching continuously for another radio station for a solid 5 minutes. (A just hates that about me…sometimes I get distracted in thought while I am searching for a radio station and he needs to bring me back to earth to yell at me to pick a channel.)

After my friend Sarah moved to Flagstaff, she emailed me to tell me about this show on NPR that I would just LOVE…it was This American Life. I told her that she I’d discovered it years ago.

I sometimes wish my life were interesting enough to be featured as a little vignette on the show. For those of you who love David Sedaris‘ dry, sarcastic humor, he is a frequent contributor. David Sedaris holds a special place in my heart and NOT because he makes me BUST out laughing when I hear him read his essays. When A and I first communicated, we were both reading his Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim…actually I was listening and he was reading. It was a good start, but he still needed convincing that I wasn’t morally corrupt for being ten minutes away from becoming a vegetarian, and I needed convincing that he wasn’t morally judgmental because he was a Republican.

I remember a time when I actually thought my life would be so awful if I listened to NPR all the time….Boy was I wrong! I rarely turn it off of NPR. In fact, I don’t even know who Amy Winehouse is outside of all the trouble and winning the Grammy’s. I have absolutely no idea what her songs sound like. What is ironic is that A told me the other night about how he heard this thing about her on NPR…it was about how she has transformed the British music scene and whatnot. A likes to think he is in the know about the music scene, so I felt better about the fact that he didn’t know any of her music either. I then asked if he’d heard about Reel Big Fish. He scoffed and said yes, but meant who do you think I am? Of course, I know who they are…duh!

Thanks to The 10,000 Hours Show, I’ll be attending the Reel Big Fish concert in April. I asked A if he wanted to go too, but I told him he’d better change his attitude first!

Me? Clumsy? February 10, 2008

Okay, so this afternoon, I agreed to play Nerf Darts with J. In order to play, he had to put me through two training tests.

Test #1 – J drew a bullseye on his dry erase easel and made me shoot until I made it into the inner ring or the bullseye. After many darts, and many attempts to show me the proper way to hold the gun and aim, I made it onto the line of the inner ring. It counted.

Test #2 – I had to stand down the hall and shoot at the door. I had to hit the inner strip anywhere…it goes from the bottom up about 5 feet. I hit this on the second dart.

Game ON! We raced around the house shooting darts at one another, ducking behind furniture and walls, scooping up darts and cocking our guns. It was quite fun and a good workout.

We eventually wound up upstairs which required much more maneuvering because the space is much smaller. J wasn’t liking my strategy of waiting for him to come to me and told me so. “You never come find me when I hide.” (Imagine the puss’n'boots begging face from Shrek.) So, I agreed to start seeking as well. No sooner had I agreed, turned the corner and shot him (I hit him.), I turned back into clumsy me.

I have NO idea how I did it, but I was moving to the right sideways into a bedroom doorway, but I SLAMMED my left side of my face into the door frame. I was shocked that I did not break my glasses.

Unfortunately, the lump on my eyelid is in EXACTLY the same place as my cellulitis which turned into a huge staph infection…A called it my third eyeball. That infection required four doctors in four days and four different antibiotics (including IV antibiotics) to get under control. This lump seems to be not so bad, but I am concerned that perhaps another infection will start in the unlucky spot. Of course, the Staph infection started out looking like a pimple then turned into a third eyeball.

Now, for some good news. I went to the Y today to run…I made it 1 mile without stopping and didn’t die! I ran more than just one mile, but this is an emotional obstacle for me. I used to run an occasional 5K, but you wouldn’t know it by the looks of me lately. I think J and I run one this summer.

I also made some good comfort food tonight…potato and carrot soup (a puree). I also chopped all my veggies up for the week as well. It is Valentine’s this weekend, so it will be difficult. It is my birthday and I will make something for my staff this week….something yummy and delightful. Unfortunately, only about half of them like coconut, so I couldn’t make my absolute favorite coconut cake. It is so moist and wonderful. I have to survey carrot cake.

How to get the girls to like you… February 4, 2008

By J, my 7 year old expert.

First you need to have a big dragon tattoo on your arms, then you grow a beard and a mustache. You have to have a cool t-shirt and workout to get big muscles. Your leg muscles have to be big too. Finally, you need an AWESOME helmet (for riding your cool motorcycle). That is how to get the girls to like you.

Earlier this same evening, when J and I got home from work/school, he took the upstairs bathroom while I took the downstairs bathroom. He came down some time later and stated quite matter of factly, “I had to do some serious business up there.”

That will really get the girls to like you!

An Absolutely True Review February 2, 2008

I just finished The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian by Sherman Alexie and it was such a great book. This is a teen book that is partially autobiographical (I believe). The writing is absolutely brilliant, and by brilliant I mean that he writes exactly as you would expect his character, Arnold Spirit, to speak. My heart broke with him and my spirits were lifted with him as Arnold navigated through his new world – leaving the reservation school to attend a white school, being shunned by his best friend and his reservation, having people expect him to do well.

The writing is honest and true, so it must be heartbreaking. I don’t find many authors tackling such difficult topics as racism with such a voice.

This is a quick read, so if you can spare a night, maybe two, it will be well worth your time.